The Fat Camp Bully.

Day three of Strep. I think Cabin fever is setting in. I thought I was doing better last night..... but I was wrong. I feel pretty awful right now. Not complaining, just stating facts. (Insert Gross, sick face.)

I started to think about fat camp. Yep, fat camp for my food addiction. I realized (a long time ago) that I base most of my life choices on or around food. I don't know why or when it started but I never used to care about food.... I think that all changed when I started to taste food, not just consumed it... and it has been a struggle ever since.... do I need to go to fat camp? Maybe, because of my addiction... to love... I mean food. Love of food. Food love. Obsession. Food obsession. Obsession of food... I think I may need too. Just saying.

So technically I would need to go to a Food Addiction Rehab. (I googled it.... but it just didn't sound as fun.)

After thinking about it for a while, wondering if I would survive, I created my Diary at Fat Camp:

Day 1:

Arrive. They find the steaks/candy/cookies that I smuggled in.... but they didn't find the cheesecake and stuffed hamburgers that I strapped to my body... boo-ya. They find those later. Crap. I start to bully other people at my table for their portions. I become fat camp bully which means I eat more. I'm not embarrassed. Mama's got to eat. 8 pm: I am hungry. I try to hitch hike to the nearest Arby's for stuffed hot peppers.... they catch me. Still hungry.

Day 2: 

They try to make me workout. I'm not feeling it. I fake fall and hurt myself. Nap time for me... sneak into the counselors cabin, only to find they eat healthy too. Obviously get caught.... now I have to workout, start dry heaving, blame it on the lack of carbs. These people have no pity, its pretty apparent they are robots, soulless robots. Dreamt about Reese's and garlic bread tonight.... so....very....weak.

Day 3:

I start to act out, I think it's the hallucinations from the lack of calories. I've lost a whole 1.2 pounds and my sanity. It's just too much. These people are the worst. They. Don't. Care. About. Human. Life. I must get out. I must break free. I must find biscuits and gravy. 

Day 4: 

I get kicked out of fat camp for being too difficult. Shows their weaknesses, not mine. Obviously. But I am okay at failing fat camp, I blame my strong will. I showed them. Pshhh

Day 5: 

Celebratory cannoli for breakfast. Sometimes I'm okay with my food obsession, especially when it comes to eating. 

~

Yeah, I wouldn't survive at any camp that takes me away from my love for food.

Here is what my head looks like at any given time.... just so you know what I'm dealing with on a day to day (minute by minute basis):

First and foremost... always wings. All the time in my head.

Ahhhh pizza. Pretty much perfection.

Cupcakes. Duh.

Gyoza is the best. Right??

Ribs, I had ribs for lunch....

Baked donuts. Or Krispy Kremes. Done and done.

Steak. So good. No veggie here. Sorry. Not Sorry.

Sushi time, every time. 

It's probably an addiction. Right? 

Does it look like I'm going to change my ways?? NOPE.

Happy Thursday!