Back in the Saddle.

It takes time. Obviously. And I am no closer to my normal self, and I don't know what that is or if I will ever find it. But I am someone else now, and that is okay. I hope that I am a wiser person for it, I think much more now, I accept much more now, and I understand the value of taking my time now more than ever. Time is precious, don't waste it on anyone that does not mean the world to you. 

So today, for the first time I am taking a long breath and I am climbing back into the saddle. I have tried to write. I've started sentences many times over the past few weeks, but every time that I do, it all just comes back to him... to Tyler... to all the questions I have for him... all the words that are left in my heart for him... and when those come, I stop typing. (and usually I start crying) I talk to him, often, don't worry. I am grieving the best that I can... but I, now, here, I want to come back to you all and write about what makes me happy... all the superficial things that don't take effort to write  about. I cannot promise that I won't write about my feelings, and I cannot promise that I won't mention how I am feeling now and again. But for today and for now I am back to blog about gooey crap, funny moments, and those things in life that just keep me going. Thank you for your patience. 

Love,

B.

My World. Let's get ready for the holidays!

So Very Blessed.

What an amazing time of year. I am still reveling in the snow falling, the adventures to come, the love that we are fully surrounded with each and every moment. Thank you Jesus. We are so blessed. Here is a little bit of our joy over the past few days....and let me just tell you there is more heading our way. I hope you all had amazing Christmas celebrations, great family memories created, and moments that you will forever hold dear to your heart. 

On the 24th Day of December Elf on the Shelf left Mini a parting Party dress(es) and a letter sending her farewell till next December 1st.

I received a little (amazing) present of my own. (and a few more later on :))

On the Eve of Christmas we had our annual festivities....and things got a little goofy.

We caught up with family.

Santa had to make room for some amazing homemade cookies. 

And someone was very good this year.....

Oh MY Desserts....

Yesterday we had our second (third) Christmas party and it was my time to make some tasty (hopefully) desserts. I gave Mini the choice to pick out exactly what she wanted when it came to what we were going to bake and she definitely knew exactly what she wanted to make....and it almost all was a first for me. So we ventured into our baking with some wonderful Christmas music playing and only the freshest of ingredients.

Here is what we ended up with these three amazing desserts: (Recipes to follow! Along with our second day of baking adventures)

Our Peppermint Kisses

Fresh Raspberry Mini Cheesecakes

The most amazing Open Faced S'more Cookies

Starting to bake in a few minutes for our second set of recipes!! Cannot wait to share!

Sick Days and Elf Ways.

We have come down with a stinky virus at this house and we are trying our hardest to get over it as fast as we can, we have resorted to many snuggles, Christmas (and the occasional karate) themed movies, chocolate malt shakes, and giggles. It is safe to say that all this is working. And while we are recovering a little Elf on the Shelf we know and love has made it's way back into the house nightly ;) Here are some of the peculiar places that we have found her:

Day One she thought she would drop by with her favorite Austrian Dark Chocolate.

Day Two she tried to hide a surprise under some 'snow'.

Day Three she got a little carried away with the candy and may have found herself stuck!

And Day Four she tries to rider her friendly (40 in!!) horse to bring a gift as well. 

I have had a blast with our Elf on the Shelf and I can't wait to come up with other ideas for the rest of the month. I am trying my own spin on it, our Elf brings little gifts every day for 24 days from the North pole, she is our own personal Advent Calendar! Are you trying anything unique with your Elf this year??

The Pecan Pie Cheesecake!

Holiday Pecan Pie Cheesecake

 What you will need: 

Buttery Crust:

2 cups vanilla wafer crumbs

¼ cup firmly packed brown sugar

⅓ cup butter, melted

Pecan Pie Filling:

1 cup sugar

⅔ cup dark corn syrup

⅓ cup butter, melted

2 eggs

1 ½ cups chopped pecans

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Cheesecake Filling:

3 (8-ounce) packages cream cheese, softened

1 ¼ cups firmly packed brown sugar

2 tablespoons all-purpose flour

4 eggs

⅔ cup heavy whipping cream

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

To start: Preheat oven to 350°. Combine wafer crumbs and brown sugar. Stir in melted butter. Press into bottom and up sides of a 9″ springform pan. Bake for 6 minutes. Set aside to cool. It will be a little mushy but don't worry it's the butter ;) 

Next: Reduce oven to 325°. Combine all ingredients for the Pecan Pie Filling in a medium saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat and simmer until thickened, about 8-10 minutes, stirring constantly. Pour into crust and set aside to cool. 

Lastly Cheesecake Filling: With a mixer, beat cream cheese at medium speed until creamy. Add brown sugar and flour and beat until fluffy. Add eggs one at a time, beating well after each one. Stir in cream and vanilla. Pour over pecan filling. Bake for 1 hour.  I would place a water bath under the Cheesecake to prevent cracking and also as a catchall for the butter that will leak from the crust will baking. 

Turn off oven and leave cheesecake in oven with the door closed for 1 hour. Remove from oven and run a knife along the outside edges to loosen cheesecake from sides of pan. Let cool. Chill for at least 4 hours before serving.

End product 

I hope you all enjoy as much as we did! 

Thanks.giving.

I was snuggling up with Mini today at work and we were chatting about life, and she had overheard someone talking about how when Christmas comes around they give less fortunate children toys. She was confused. She then told me about how just this month people talk about what they are thankful for. She was confused again.

The reason for her confusion? She said it so perfectly, "Mommy, we give all year round to people and donate what we can, and we tell God what we are thankful for all year round, not just November."

Out of the mouth of babes.

I am blessed every day out of the year. We all are whether we acknowledge it or not. I try so hard to make it a point to show my thankfulness and teach her to do the same. I believe the old adage, 'To much is given, much is required," And Mini and I have been blessed abundantly in love, grace, peace, monetarily and spiritually and because of that it is my joy as a roll model and parent to teach giving and donation to instill a servants heart. And let me just tell you, Mini has the sweetest heart out there. Goodness she is amazing!

So I may not partake in posting what I am thankful for, for a month, but I hope that I show what I am thankful for year round. I hope I make it personal, and I let those around me know my inner gratitude. I hope everyone embraces thanks.giving. Even maybe past Black Friday :)

Even the smallest of gifts count...